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Take Backs (feat. Ryan Heinlein)

by Kadesh Flow

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about

I wrote this in July 2020, frustrated and in a funk about my decision to pursue my passions as a career, and resenting how my anguish over losing my livelihood right as I was starting to walk into abundance as a self-sustained indie musician was cut off by COVID had started to affect my relationship again. It's a song about regret and questioning everything.

Ryan Heinlein obliterated the trombone solo.

lyrics

There’s so much I wish I could take back
High risk high reward. Shouldn’t have embraced that
I hate that I ever listened
To myself


I’ve been on a bender
Bae had some words
I replied absurd
Things I don’t remember

Was hoping July
Would see this pass by
It could be December

Now I feel dismantled
How can I handle
What we’ve been rendered

What does my future even mean
Right now

This stress load has me doing crazy things
I bow

Out. So close. Bookings 10k in a week
Wiped out

Feeling deflated
Heavy depression
Goes unabated
This was obsession
Now insulated
I’m going crazy
Can’t satiate it
I wasn’t resting
I had to make it

But what does making it mean
Now that my living’s been stripped away
That question’s obscene
I can’t forgive
Myself for obeying
My tendencies

Could’ve been safer
But my behavior
Has me reeling

Could’ve been safer
But my behavior
Has me reeling

There’s so much I wish I could take back
High risk high reward. Shouldn’t have embraced that
I hate that I ever listened
To myself
Trombone solo/riffing

credits

released March 27, 2021
Written, produced, performed, mixed, and mastered by Kadesh Flow
Trombone work by Ryan Heinlein

license

all rights reserved

tags

about

Kadesh Flow Kansas City, Missouri

"A propulsive emcee, a bold songwriter, a skilled trombonist, an auspicious producer and an enterprising artist" - 90.9 The Bridge

Rapper with an MBA, a trombone Super Saiyan, and a Billboard Charting recording/ performing artist.
Tromboned on tracks with hip hop stars like Jidenna and underground stalwarts like Strange Music's Ubiquitous and JL.
Opened for Janelle Monae, Tech N9ne, Rakim, etc.
... more

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